I have given up sleeping it seems. Night after night I am awake, wide awake at twelve, one and even two o'clock in the morning. Late nights make Julie a very hateful, cranky person. I am finding myself looking at people now and imagining the horrible, terrible things I would love to do to them for seemingly simple things like turning left in front of me or not making my breakfast sandwich toasted on a twelve grain bagel lightly buttered with egg and cheese and no meat. Yes no meat seems simple enough doesn't it. I'm ok. My family isn't though. They have been my entourage of late desperately carting things to and from the car, making supper and tip toeing around the bear who apparently has taken up residence in the house. I found myself the other night taking Son#1's keys...can't even remember why and for a nano second almost threw them in the lake. Oh I need help. Son #2 snapped me out of it. "Mom Mom...over the top". We did finally laugh in the end but for 30 seconds I nearly had to dig out the wet suit that probably doesn't fit me anymore and go snorkeling for Honda keys. Oh I need to sleep and tonight my friends I sleep. I am so taking a happy pill. I know I know they are just for flying but well occasionally I have caved and taken one for sleeping and well this forty something year old needs her zzzz's. Tomorrow I might even smile! Did I tell you I joined a gym and have a personal trainer...yah I'm hiding from her. She keeps calling wondering why I haven't come to the gym this week. I'd go but she scares me and well the whole hateful thing and exercise doesn't mix. Well maybe it does Son #1 keeps telling me it's a commitment, make it a priority, you can do it...blah blah blah. How about you swim to the middle of the lake and let's play who can find the Honda keys...kidding kidding. I did finally apologize today after a week of terrorizing my family it's bad when you start to wonder "did I just say and do that". But tomorrow tomorrow is another day and tomorrow I will have slept. So night night all...forgive me for the happy pill relapse but the sleep will be sweet. Mama about to be somewhat drugged signing out!
About Me
- Julie Chaisson
- I am a 40 something Christian woman who is wanting to live her life wide open to make a difference in the world for God. I'm married to Mike and have two sons Matt and Andrew and a baby girl named Emily. We are embarking on an adventure together to help stop the world's orphan crisis.
I have given up sleeping it seems. Night after night I am awake, wide awake at twelve, one and even two o'clock in the morning. Late nights make Julie a very hateful, cranky person. I am finding myself looking at people now and imagining the horrible, terrible things I would love to do to them for seemingly simple things like turning left in front of me or not making my breakfast sandwich toasted on a twelve grain bagel lightly buttered with egg and cheese and no meat. Yes no meat seems simple enough doesn't it. I'm ok. My family isn't though. They have been my entourage of late desperately carting things to and from the car, making supper and tip toeing around the bear who apparently has taken up residence in the house. I found myself the other night taking Son#1's keys...can't even remember why and for a nano second almost threw them in the lake. Oh I need help. Son #2 snapped me out of it. "Mom Mom...over the top". We did finally laugh in the end but for 30 seconds I nearly had to dig out the wet suit that probably doesn't fit me anymore and go snorkeling for Honda keys. Oh I need to sleep and tonight my friends I sleep. I am so taking a happy pill. I know I know they are just for flying but well occasionally I have caved and taken one for sleeping and well this forty something year old needs her zzzz's. Tomorrow I might even smile! Did I tell you I joined a gym and have a personal trainer...yah I'm hiding from her. She keeps calling wondering why I haven't come to the gym this week. I'd go but she scares me and well the whole hateful thing and exercise doesn't mix. Well maybe it does Son #1 keeps telling me it's a commitment, make it a priority, you can do it...blah blah blah. How about you swim to the middle of the lake and let's play who can find the Honda keys...kidding kidding. I did finally apologize today after a week of terrorizing my family it's bad when you start to wonder "did I just say and do that". But tomorrow tomorrow is another day and tomorrow I will have slept. So night night all...forgive me for the happy pill relapse but the sleep will be sweet. Mama about to be somewhat drugged signing out!
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